January 25 Play: LITTLE RED REDUX

25: LITTLE RED REDUX - by Ed Valentine
© January 25, 2010 * ed@edvalentine.com

LIGHTS UP: Cottage. Woods above, and above a full gold moon. GRANDMOTHER stirring the coals of a fire, LITTLE RED by the door with a basket.

GRANNY: You have everything, Child?

RED: Yes.

GRANNY: The cupcakes? The cookies? The meat pies? The pasties? The scones and the pies and the ale and the loaf?

RED: Yes, but.

GRANNY: No time for buts, Child. Be on your way.

RED: But Granny!

GRANNY: What?

RED: It’s dark out.

GRANNY: Not entirely.

RED: It’s night!

GRANNY: There’s a moon. A full moon!

RED: That’s why I’m afraid!
-
I’ve heard that on nights of the full moon, the wolves come out. And if the wolves come out, I’ll be endangered! I’ll be meat, don’t you see?

GRANNY: My Child, My Child! Don’t you see? Those are old superstitions. Old wives tales. And don’t I know some old wives. Do you see?

RED: I guess.

GRANNY: You’re never safer than when the moon lolls over the earth, licking it clean like a wolf’s tongue on its privates.

RED: Uh, Granny...

GRANNY: The earth’s never as clean as when it’s licked clean by the moon’s tongue. How could anything terrible happen on a night like this?

RED: Still.

GRANNY: Now hurry, dear! Your poor other grandmother, poor spindly stick, lies waiting, sick in her bed. Hungry!

RED: We’re all hungry.

GRANNY: Isn’t that the truth! Don’t think about dipping into that basket!

RED: I wasn’t.

(She was.)

GRANNY: Off with you, then, luv! Off with you, off into the forest!
(Pushes RED out the door. Calls off:)
And don’t leave the path, my Sweet.
Goodbye! Goodbye!
My Sweet, My Sweet.

(GRANDMOTHER takes off her face, rips off her dress. She is, of course, a WOLF. SPEAKS TO US:)

WOLF: My Sweet.
Really, dears, what did you expect?
(He licks himself.)
I’ll give her a sporting start.
3.
2.
1!
(HOWLS. Paws the ground.)
Save some meat for me, baby.
I’m coming.

(He gallops off. Lights burn, then fade.)

END OF PLAY.